October Happenings

It would appear that this is the first blogpost in over a month. Once again it has escaped me. My life seems so routine that I worry about bringing boredom to my readers.

This month has gone by so fast. Some days seem slow - especially with preparing for accreditation and dealing with challenges in the classroom. However now that I sit back here, it's hard to see the distinct line between days.

Here are some of the highlights from this month:

Loss of Water - A main water pipe burst on a Sunday night. This sadly happened right before I was going to take a shower after spending the day in a heavily chlorinated pool. For 48 straight hours there was no water for showering, laundry, and cleaning. Now in the grand scheme of things 2 days seems like nothing, but living in a tropical country when this sort of thing happens is not sanitary. Mold and algae creep up in a matter of days. And let me tell you, 2 days (I suppose 3 if you count Sunday) without a shower is NASTY! Now a few weeks later, there are still water problems and nearly every day the water is turned off at sporadic times of the day (most times when I want to take a shower).

Death of a Computer - Sometimes I hate technology - actually a lot of the time. As beneficial as it is to have a computer, they often bring more problems than they are worth. Mine had been falling apart for quite a while. It was with me when I got in my motorbike accident back in April, my cat took to chewing some vital wires in my computer, and the hinge cracked loose. I kept it home for weeks, using the computer at school. I was determined to hold out until Christmas to get a new one. On Thursday of last week, my computer decided to go to sleep forever. I ended up buying a new one that weekend and it has been a blessing to have a fully functioning computer. I backed up my vital documents so it was not as tragic as it could have been - much like the last time.

Professional Development in Jakarta - On Monday and Tuesday this week, all of the SPH schools met at the new campus in Kemang (an uppity part of Jakarta). It was very beneficial (minus one of the sessions I was in). I felt like I was in college again, talking about worldview this and worldview that. My goodness it was like getting re-indoctrinated in Reformed Theology. Not my particular favorite outcome of those two days, but not the worst. A bunch of girls and I stayed overnight in the Aston Suites. With a great Western styled breakfast, roof top pool, and an alarm set for seven (instead of 4 am when everyone else had to get up from Sentul), it trumped any other option. It also made the week a bit more relaxed and feel more holiday-ish.

Celebrating Diwali - With there being five main "accepted" religions in Indonesia, I have become well versed in different religious holidays. Last night I was invited to have dinner and celebrate Diwali, the Hindu festival of lights. In their religion, this holiday celebrates a god who came back after exile and conquered the darkness/evil of other gods. Many candles are lit, fireworks go off, and sweets/gifts are exchanged. A mother of one of my students had me come over with some other parents. We dressed in Indian sarees and ate like kings. Afterwards we set off fire works and were told the story of Diwali. It was a very cultural eye-opening experience. I'm glad that I got to be a part of it. However, it disturbs me that people worship idols and other gods. I always knew that there were other people in this world that are not Christians, but seeing it in this light boggles my mind. It breaks my heart that they do not see the light of Christ. However, I feel it incumbent to be tolerant and loving (as hard as it might be), and show the light of Christ in the midst the darkness and disparity of other religions.

Official Publication - So I've been keeping this a secret for a while, but the cat got out of the bag so I'm just going to clear the air and shout it from the rooftops of Indonesia. I am officially a published author of a historical fiction novel. I just submitted the last of my materials and will receive a mock-up copy to read through. It will be available after Christmas and I am very, very excited about this. It has always been my dream to publish something, and finally I can cross this off my bucket list.

Well that's about all the updates there are from this side of the world - until next time...

Alive and Well (Sort of)

Well looking back at the date of my last blog post, it's been exactly one month since I last entered anything in here. A lot has happened since then, not necessarily good things, but things none the less.

First off I got my wallet stolen on the way home from school a few weeks ago. As stressing as the situation could be, I felt relatively calm about the whole situation. I made some phone calls, borrowed some cash from friends. After waiting a while, I got my credit card and debit card last week.

During this stretch of downtime, I also had a scary run-in with some robbers. I was convinced that I needed to stay up late one night, finishing watching Army Wives (which by the way is a fantastic show - definitely recommend it). As I was in the bathroom, I heard some people talking, and thought it was my neighbors a few doors down. Then as I went in my room, under the covers, I heard a shrill shrieking of metal and two men covered in bandannas were on my balcony trying to pry my door open.

Thinking as quickly as I could, I grabbed my important documents and raced out the door. I drove all over Sentul (at 3:00 in the morning no-less) to find a security guard that spoke English. No one, absolutely no one knew a lick of English. And my Bahasa, well in short - is lacking. I can understand more than I can speak, and with a fury of tears, it was hard to explain what was happening. I finally ended up at school and drew some pictures to relay the events of the early morning.

Long story really short, my balcony was broken and the robbers luckily didn't get in. But being me, I was freaking out like no one's business. I spent the week at my friend's house (it was during holiday, so a bit more convenient).

I've been a bit worried, even though it's been about 3 weeks. It took me a while to sleep by myself. Thankfully I have some friends that are really patient and willing to stay with me. Now I finally feel comfortable sleeping by myself and even hired a security guard for me personally.

The kids have been up in arms as have the teachers. There has been a lot of political things going on and the kids in my class are a bit unique (there are really no words to explain). The consideration of beating my head against the wall happens multiple times on a daily basis. There are a number of students who have disabilities, and the lack of experienced supporting staff can be overwhelming at times.

Anyway, despite the fact that I'm struggling to keep afloat mentally and emotionally, things are starting to look up. Hey, after all, it is mid-September. I can't believe I've been in school for nearly two months already this academic year!

The highlight of this month has to have come last night. I met up with some missionaries, which our little church/small group supports. They have a ministry in a village called Cihuelet and the women have learned how to quilt. The importance of this is great, because these missionaries are trying to get these women off the street from begging and prostitution. I ordered a quilt from some left over material I had from my new comforter and finally got it last night. It's beautiful and hand sewn. I cannot wait to post pictures. Hopefully I will do so soon.

Over Christmas holiday, all of the expats will be taking handmade things back to the States and sell them to support these women in the village. Doing these handicrafts keeps them off the street, have a steady income, and allow them to be introduced to Christ. It's such an amazing ministry. To those of you who actually read this blog, pass along this information. I would like to take many handicrafts home to sell and support this ministry because it is vital. And without this income for the women and these missionaries, it would be a lost cause.

These missionaries (who I will not name airing on the side of caution) have a dangerous job because openly evangelizing Indonesians to other Indonesians is quite an unacceptable/intolerable thing to do. There are serious consequences that can result in the identification of their ministry.

Anyway, that's really about it. Sorry for the long period between updates. I will try to keep it on a weekly basis rather than a monthly one. Thanks for your prayers and concerns.

Just Another Week In Paradise

Ever have one of those days where everything goes wrong? Of course you have, everyone has. However, I had one of those days that stretched into a week that everything goes wrong. I had a few breakdowns - most of them were justifiable. However that seems to be the regular norm.

I've been trying to have a positive attitude and pray about it. This week I read through Psalms and I was really encouraged. It seemed to uplift me, even when I felt like I was drowning in disparity. And of course, I cannot withhold thanks from my parents and grandparents - they are a solid foundation of support. They always find something encouraging to say to me, even when I'm at my lowest. I thank God for them everyday that he has put them in my life. How blessed am I. The four wisest people I know are my pillars of strength.

Anyway, as I think back on the week, I honestly cannot remember anything that happened. I feel like time blurs together and I get amnesia. Perhaps its better that way. However, I distinctly remember Friday. If you were in my classroom, you'd remember too. It was a war zone. The students were at each other's throats. In a nutshell, here's what happened.

• Two of the girls started a rumor that another one of my student's had fleas. There was lots of tears and arguments over that.
• Every time I started a lesson, one of my boys busted out (multiple times) in the chicken dance - which threw off every lesson I had.
• Two boys were wrestling for fun during break time and it turned into a fist fight. A third boy thought he accidentally started the fight (which is strange) and so he hid and we searched all over school for a half hour to find him.
• One boy decided it would be funny to pull chairs out from people while they were attempting to sit - resulting in many crying kids.
• An email was sent informing us that in two hours a document was due (two hours when I had to teach). The document was given to me a half hour AFTER I got the email.
• On a dare, one of my boys ate a whole piece of paper. He thought it was tasty and so I had to stop him from eating every piece of paper in sight. That same boy was mad that I took away all his paper so he spit on a girl's poster.
• One of my boys drew "boy parts" and "girl parts" on his picture and proceeded to explain (in explicit detail) to one of the girls (who happens to be a staff kid) what they meant and did.

Oh yes, it was a LOVELY day! As I think back on it all, I can't help but laugh. At the time, I wasn't laughing. Oh no, the kids saw the wrath of Ms. Marie - several times.

But Friday ended on a positive note. One of my struggling students had worked so hard. He was dedicated to everything he started (which is VERY unlike him). I'm usually chasing him down and making new copies for him. He has a rough home life - really rough. Starting last Monday, I decided I'd make him my personal project this year. He is quite neglected by his parents, and so I want to show him as much teacherly and motherly love as possible. He needs it, he just feels so worthless much of the time. Anyway, he was dedicated to everything he did and finished it. At the end of the day, when all the kids had gone home, I gave him this huge sticker that says "Stellar Student" and told him I've never been more proud of him than this week. He lit up like a string of Christmas lights. He started crying and said, "Ms. Marie, no one's ever told me they were proud of me before. I wish someone at home would tell me that." Then he gave me a big hug and ran out. It melted my heart.

Even despite the fact that my week seemed to be going to hell in a handbag, Nathan was my saving grace. Even if I have the worst year ever of teaching, if I can reach out to him and be successful, I will have had a productive year.

As this weekend comes to a close, I find excitement that Idul Fitri holiday is just around the corner - less than two weeks. I've never needed a holiday more than right now - and school just started! So from now until then, I'll take one day at a time (one hour at a time - if needed). I'll make it to the finish line. I have to, I must!

A Swing Towards Positive

It's been a little over a week and things are starting to look up. It was a rough start to this new academic year. I felt like I was drowning and everyone/everything seemed to beat me over the head. I am so thankful for my grandparents and my mother for getting me through this rough patch. Through their prayers and encouragement, I was finally able to get a new perspective and a burden lifted. God has been so good this past week.

My grandpa sent me an email with the verse Philippians 4:13. I'm sure most of you are familiar with this verse and know it by heart. "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." It seems like such an simple verse, but I have definitely taken it for granted.

I woke up every morning and recited the verse. I can do anything - anything, when Christ is by my side.

Things in the classroom and with administration seemed to cool down and I felt as if I could finally set out for what I yearned for - to teach and be fully devoted to my students and coworkers.

This week I started (and finished) a book called "Tuesdays With Morrie." It's a fantastic book, and for all of you who have never read it - this is a must read. It's a book that tells about a dying professor who has Lou Gehrig's disease. He is reunited with one of his former students and they meet every week to talk about life and the issues they face. There were two particular things that struck me, and have resonated in my ears all week.

The first thing Morrie talked about was how it is important to limit self-pity. Set aside a small bit of time, if needed - but when your reflecting is done, don't turn back to it. Self-pity only brings you down and there's really nothing you can do, especially when change/outcome is inevitable. You cannot spend your life in mourning, but rather approach it with joy and exuberance.

The next thing that he said was "You learn to live when you learn to die." Death is something that we know will eventually happen to all of us - but at the same time, we take life for granted. Morrie talks about how, if you consider this may be your last day on earth, you will do things differently. If you are a teacher - you will teach differently, knowing that it may be your last chance to make an impact on your students. Earthly things don't mean anything, but relationships with God, your family, friends, and even strangers are what bring importance to your life.

The last few days, before I drove to school, I said to myself: "If today was my last day - what would I do differently." As I dwell on this throughout the day, I find myself more patient, smiley, and upbeat. When God calls me home (and that may be tonight, tomorrow, next month, next year, or even in decades from now), I don't want to have taken my last day for granted. I want to go out with a bang - imprinting my passion and love to all who I interact with (even to those extra-grace required people, as my mom would put it).

Anyway, with the support from my family, countless prayers, and an insight from this book, I pushed the "restart" button for my year. I want this year to be memorable and joyous like the previous one. And it is only through Christ who gives me strength, that I will be able to do so.

A Year of Challenges

A lot of things have changed at SPH since last year. Sometimes I wonder how such drastic changes could happen so quickly (and frequently). It seems that every day a new problem springs a surprise attack. To be honest, it's difficult to be positive.

We have re-accreditation and so to impress our examiners, we are implementing numerous things that should have been implemented all along. In short, this has put a strain on many of the teachers, including myself.

In Grade 6 there are a total of 9 teachers, all teaching different subjects. To collaborate with all of them and then in smaller groups (which are divided among disciplines) is more than a challenge. Then to find time to plan and collaborate with all the teachers in my Grade 3 students is even more challenging. Any free time that I am allotted is devoted to one grade or another. By the time I get a chance to plan for the next day, the school day is well over. I'm not used to going on a day-by-day basis, I would rather plan the whole week, but there just isn't even time.

On top of that, I have a number of challenging students (academically and behaviorally) in my class of 20 students. Some have difficult learning disabilities. However, learning disabilities are dealt with differently in Indonesia than in the States. No action is taken unless the disability consists of disfigurement. So to teach my students, assist with those with disabilities that I can amateurly identify the symptoms to, and keep my higher level students from becoming bored is a lot for my plate.

Of course all of these things take place during the school day. After school I am co-directer to "Christmas Carol" (the musical) for middle school, head-director to "Reason for the Season" for elementary students, recruited onto two accreditation teams, and an after school tutoring session with one of my students.

It's stressful thinking about what each hour might bring, let alone an entire day. I feel as if there is a severe unbalance and truth be told - there is. I know that I can get it all done, but I feel like my sanity is dropping to a new low.

Please pray that this year runs smoothly. It's only day 2 of the official academic year and I'm ready for another summer vacation!

The second year of school has officially commenced. Although the kids do not come until Tuesday, I have been back for two days now. To be honest, I've come home both days exhausted and ready for bed around seven. I don't know why, all I've been doing is sitting through hours upon hours of mind-numbing meetings.

I've never really minded meetings, but when they are led in a condescending fashion and about things that have already been talked to death, I find myself rapidly losing my intelligence. It's like it melts away and craziness reigns in place of it.

Tomorrow is the last day of these types of meetings, and I'm counting down the hours. I'm ready for the kids to be back and this nonsense to end. Then tomorrow night we have a mandatory dinner that all the teachers have to attend for the families of new students. We officially have 91 new students (but they count the incoming grade 7's, who have been at the school for many years already - I guess they see it as an initiation of sorts). So excluding the grade 7's, we have about 70 new students to the school (K - 10). I think that's pretty impressive.

Although I'm only 2 days into being back, I miss the long summer days I had. Summer seems so short here (and in truth, it certainly is). I feel like I could have done so many more things, and yet, I feel that I accomplished everything I had as goals. And though I miss my family, I feel like I'm settled and better adjusted than before. Seeing all the staff again made me realize how much of a family we truly are. Despite the political garbage that tends to go on, I love these people as if they have adopted me.

Well, I'm off to bed. Till next time...

The Start of a New (Academic) Year

Hello friends,

It's been a few weeks since I last posted. I have enjoyed my (short) summer holiday. I'm excited for the new academic year to commence in a week and a half, and yet dreading it. The idea of having to wake up before nine-thirty in the morning makes me want to cry. But in any case, I will do it with a smile on my face.

My summer was very relaxing. Just what I needed.

The first week of my break I spent packing up my house in BGH. Just for the record, there is absolutely no reason for one person to have more than 2 bedrooms in a house. I don't know how those bachelor/ette millionaires do it. Honestly, what else do you really need besides the basic essentials?

After getting everything packed, I realized that I have accumulated a ton of stuff since being here. Lots of furniture, new clothes, housing decorations...wowza! Then on a Monday morning the following week, some of the office boys, my neighbors, and a few teachers helped me move and unpack. It was helpful to have so many hands to assist me. I probably would still be unpacking if I had to do it alone.

The remainder of my break was spent working on my novel, catching up on some beloved tv shows (if you have not seen the new remake of Hawaii Five-O series - you need to....there are literally no words to describe how amazing that show is), swimming, decorating my house, and working on preparing my classroom. A teacher's job is never done - even during vacation. However, I don't seem to mind - especially with the stress-free environment.

Yesterday (Tuesday) evening, I went to the airport to meet one of the new expatriate teachers. Let me tell you, it was definitely an experience. The school driver brought me to the airport and I had to find a girl - whom I've never met or seen a picture of OR have a sign. Definitely problematic. So I started to single out the people who were traveling alone, white, and had a lot of luggage. Low and behold, I found her. Thank goodness....I would have been in serious trouble if I would have come back without her.

The remainder of this week is dedicated to helping the new teachers shop and get adjusted to the Indonesian lifestyle. I feel like I am an encyclopedia of information sometimes. A few days ago I was not looking forward to spending the last weeks of my summer helping new teachers, but then I realized that I was so thankful when others did that for me. I would have probably lost my mind without help and guidance of other teachers. And now that it's already begun, it's actually quite enjoyable.

Aside from that, I'm trying to get back to a "normal" sleep schedule (yes, the one where I wake at the crack of dawn) so I'm not a walking zombie on the first day of school.

Thanks for all prayers and patience in my blog writing.

Until next time....

1st Year of Teaching:Complete

As I sit here typing this,I am officially on summer break, and have been for a few days now. It's crazy to think that my first year of teaching is over. It went by so fast, but it was such a joy. I've accomplished many things both personally and professionally. I look forward to the next year that will commence in a little over a month.

The end of the year went out with a bang. We celebrated with my class at one of our student's house. It was her "afternoon house" which basically is a big play land until her parents pick her up and bring her to Jakarta for the night. The house was massive and had a huge swimming pool. We had a picnic lunch and swam most of the day.

It was sad to say goodbye to my students, knowing that I probably won't teach them again, unless I stay in Grade 6 English. However, as sad as I am, I cannot wait for the new batch of Grade 3 students to come into my class next year. There will be a lot of changes, some I am excited about, some -- not so much. But you live and learn with each year that passes.

After two days of meetings and "goodbye ceremonies," the teachers were finally finished with their school year. There was a lot of celebrations, mostly over dinner or breakfast. It was great to have fellowship and laugh about all the things that happened over the year.

This week, my first official week of summer vacation, we focused on the expats that are finished with their contracts and leaving the country. It's always difficult to say goodbye, especially when the people who are leaving are not just co-workers but your friends and family.

Last night we had dinner, and this morning we had breakfast together. It was simple but so fun. But I am quite excited for the new expats who are coming in next year. I think they will make great additions to our community.

On another note, I'd like to thank all of you who have been praying and supporting me through this experience. It would not be possible without you! I look forward to spending another year with you via blog!

With that being said, I am going to proceed and tell you all that I am taking an extended hiatus from writing until school starts up again. As most of you know I am moving and in the process of finishing my novel. I only have 6 weeks to do it all, and I want to make sure I am completely focused on finishing these two things.

Have a great summer! Catch up with you at the end of July! Much love to you all!

You Know You're In Indonesia When...

I know many of you will probably never make it to Indonesia in your lifetime. Since I know this is the case for many of my readers, I would like to give you a taste of the intricacies of life in this country. Brace yourself...you may be in for a real surprise.

• Indonesia embraces 5 main religions, however it is a predominantly Muslim country.
  
  
• A mosque's call to prayer is 4-5 times a day, you're lucky if you live far enough away to not get woken by one.
  
  
• Christian communities are not allowed to build their own churches, they must be use an already vacant space.
  
  
• Rupiah is the currency used in this country. Despite the falling of the US dollar, 10,000 rupiah is equivalent to $1.20.
  
  
• There is no such thing as joint bank accounts.
  
  
• The cost of living is significantly lower here, and yet you hear complaints about things being too expensive.
  
  
• When Indonesia was colonized by the Dutch for 300 years, the traffic yielded as it does in the States. However when the British came in for a meager 15 years, traffic flowed in the opposite direction and has continued to stay that way.
  
  
• There are no regulations on car emissions.
  
  
• Ojeks (motorcycle taxis which can squish up to a family of 5) and Ancauts (public minivans which can crush up to 25 people inside) are the main source of public transport.
  
  
• Driving on the shoulder is perfectly acceptable.
  
  
• If the police pull you over, you are left with no choice than to bribe them.
  
  
• When a car accident happens, the bigger car is always at fault no matter what the circumstance.
  
  
• No one gets out of the way of ambulances because typically they only transport dead people.
  
  
• Fruits, vegetables, drinks, and dollar store-like trinkets are sold at every major intersection.
  
  
• Monkeys dancing with broken doll faces is normal street entertainment.
  
  
• For every and any job, there is a uniform. There is no such thing as free-dress.
  
  
• Drivers, Maids, Gardeners, and Nannies play a vital role in most families.
  
  
• Squatee potties and spray hoses are common for most public bathroom: no tissue provided.
  
  
• Tap water is not sanitary, you must either boil it or get a water dispenser.
  
  
• The only hot water provided is for the shower.
  
  
• Despite the fact that you may live alone, there are usually dozens of geckos running across the floor, walls, and ceilings at any given time.
  
  
• It is not uncommon to have a snake, scorpion, or cockroach sneak in under the doorways during a rainstorm.
  
  
• Rain comes down nearly every day.
  
  
• There are 2 seasons in Indonesia: Rainy and Dry. The rainy season provides a steady rain for endless hours every day, the dry season provides a once over heavy rain every few days.
  
  
• Bogor (the next town over) is the Lightning STRIKE-DOWN capital of the world.
  
  
• Doctors offices open at 4pm and close at 9pm, rather than in the morning.
  
  
• Rice is served for all meals of the day.
  
  
• Milk comes in 2 forms: non-refrigerated (which tastes like breast milk) and refrigerated (western 2% milk).
  
  
• Pork is considered unclean to Muslims so most stores do not sell it, most maids will not cook with it.
  
  
• If you find a hair in your food, simply just pull it out and continue eating. There is no complaining or returning of food.
  
  
• There are forks and spoons, but no knives.
  
  
• Many desserts contain cubed jelly.
  
  
• Sausage and most preserved meat is orange.
  
  
• Piracy in entertainment is a huge money maker, you are more likely to find a pirated dvd than a legal one. It's hard to tell the difference when watching them.
  
  
• Spa treatment is not a luxury, it is a necessity. You would think so too if most every means of being pampered was under 8 dollars.
  
  
• 90% of Indonesia's population resides in Jakarta and the island of Bali.
  
  
• The number 4 is an unlucky number. Most buildings are no taller than 3 stories, and if they are, they simply skip over any number that contains the number 4. For instance if you see floor 39 the following floor will be 50.
  
  
• Never trust a hairdresser. You say one inch, they cut four (or more).
  
  
• Staring and pointing at white people is something that most everyone does. You might even find yourself doing it too when you see a white person. (If you're like me, you get territorial - forgetting that you too are white - when you see other white people.)
  
  
• Being white is movie star status, prepare yourself for engaging in countless picture.
  
  
• Racism is very much alive amongst the distinct classes of Indonesians.
  
  
• The sun rises at 6 a.m. and sets at 6 p.m.
  
  
• An average daily temperature is 85 - 90 degrees.
  
  
• After spending 3+ months in Indonesian's tropical climate, your blood is thinned out. If the temperature falls below 80 degrees, you will probably end up breaking out long sleeved shirts and sweatshirts.
  
  
• Bahasa Indonesia is the easiest language to learn. There are almost no grammar rules and everything is phonetic.
  
  
• Basic Bahasa Indonesian skills are helpful, but if all else fails - hand motions communicate most everything else.

I hope you've gained a whole new education about Indonesia. It took me several months to accumulate this list. I'm sure after spending another year here, the list will grow.

Until next time...

Lessons Learned As a Teacher

The end of the school year marks my 11 month placement here. It’s surprising that I’ve gotten this far already. It seems like just yesterday when I left my home to head to O’Hare airport. My mom and my brother, Brad drove me first to my grandparents house to say goodbye to them. As I was about to leave, my dad surprised me to say one last goodbye. He had rushed home from work to make sure he could get one last hug until Christmas. I lost control of my emotions, the first of many on this trek across the world.

Then it was off to the airport. I was trying to be brave the entire ride, coming up with petty conversation to distract us from the inevitable. As we reached the final oasis and got some Starbucks, I fell apart. The end was near – the time where I knew I wouldn’t be able to see my family every day, or even come home on surprise weekend escapades. I would be a world away, submerged in a completely different culture. I hugged them both, and by this time both my mom and I were crying. It was a cry of both sadness and excitement.

Despite the fact that I am very much in love with my job and this country, I can’t help but cry thinking of these last sad moments before my life changed. Bittersweet emotions doused with excitement are emotions that one cannot experience unless it actually happens to you.

I thank God for my family who has supported me from the very beginning and continue to do so even now. Even though there was a lot of unknowns of what was about to come, we all knew this was God’s calling for me.

I’ve learned a lot about being a teacher. I know that this will help me in the future, wherever I may end up. These are just a few lessons I’ve learned:

-Don’t be afraid to ask for help. It is not a sign of weakness if you do so!

-It is important to find a way to grade efficiently, effectively, and quickly.

-Be nice to the secretaries and office people, it will benefit in times of need.

-Preparing lessons a week in advance is less stressful and provides more free time on the weekends.

-Despite being prepared for lessons in advance, some of the best lessons are spur of the moment.

-Some lessons just don’t work. Quitting in the middle of one is better than to make them more confused.

-Novel studies are more difficult than they appear. Don’t even get me started on multiple novel studies at one time.

-Bulletin boards are overrated, especially when you have 12 of them.

-A clean classroom is hard to keep up, especially when you have some creative geniuses.

-One student may change the dynamics of an entire class – when that student is absent a change in atmosphere is inevitable (and sometimes celebratory) .

-Kids are more apt to choose the internet over books, it is important to maintain a balance.

-Youtube is very helpful in lessons, so why it’s banned from classroom networks is beyond me.

-Teachers get antsier for holidays than kids.

-If there is no follow-up – it is not a priority.

-Making mistakes are inevitable, especially slip-ups of the tongue.

-Kids say the darnest things (I’ve kept a running record) – you need to think quick on your feet or the lesson will crumble.

I’m sure there are many other things I’m forgetting, but these are a few things I will never forget. Stay tuned for the next installment of lessons learned: You Know You’re In Indonesia When…

When It Rains, It Pours

Yes, that statement is so true in multiple contexts. The most obvious: the weather. However, that's not what I'm talking about in this particular blog.

With only a few short weeks left of school, our campus has been plagued by a virus so bad that it's wiped out fistfuls of teachers at a time. At first this went around the student body, and after it successfully sickened many students, it hit the teachers and administration like a tsunami wave.

I, sadly, have fallen victim to this miserable sickness. For the past four days I have been subjected to high temperatures, a wicked cough, and all the gross-unnecessary-details that come with it. It's times like these where I desperately wish I was not a half a world away from my wonderful mother. She has always taken such good care of my whiny self whenever I fall ill.

I'm not the bravest person on the face of the planet. Some may disagree, and if you are, you are severely mistaken. I get weepy and whiny, and seem to lose all particles of common sense and reality. I'm sure my mother would rather do other things than to cater to my beck and call - but she truly has a tender heart and always finds soothing ways to make me feel better. I only hope that when my (future) children grow sick, I can be as kind and warm-hearted as my mother. After all, she is the expert.

Well that's about it of my senseless rambling - pray that this virus passes soon. Only a few weeks left of school and I want them to go out with a bang!

Overexertion is Overrated

This past week was Grade 6 exhibition and was by far one of the most demanding weeks of school for me. It was not stressful by any means, but it required an overabundant amount of participation, time, and preparation. I spent more time outside of my class than in my class. I know that Budi and my kids really missed me because of my absence. It's truly been hard trying to balance grade 6 exhibition with my grade 3 class. I'm not quite sure if the whole set-up is ideal, in fact it isn't: it's impractical. However, there's no changing what's already been planned out.

I worked with the kids setting up their exhibition displays in the gymnasium. Some kids were easier to work with than others. It took a creative eye to set up each display so to uphold strategic eye-catching appeal. When that was done, the performances were practiced over and over again. Each group had a skit, dance, song, or poem that they had to deliver to the audience. My job was to keep the kids on task backstage, and it proved to be more demanding than I expected. Although it sounds rather easy, and it was, it proceeded to take any ounce of energy away from me.

I spent lots of extra time at school and lost a lot of sleep, due to the fact that I was wound up and on a continuous wheel pondering the "what ifs."

By Friday I felt like a walking zombie, looking to steal any spark of zeal that was gifted in my direction. My body felt like mush, my eyes were puffed and protested staying open, and a slow crawl towards sickness was upon me.

When all was said and done, I came home with a fever and a nasty cough. I slept through most of the weekend, and when I wasn't doing that I was in bed watching movies.

Since March, I feel as if I have not been the competent teacher I once was because of all the many commitments that have been demanded of me. Yes, I understand that I will always have committees and commitments, but I've come to realize that our school is on a "strained" budget (one similar to an adult that has Macy's taste on a Walmart budget) and understaffed. This being said, I find that throughout the year everyone seems to feel overwhelmed by this, like I have this week.

As the end of the school year approaches, I can't help but think of the movie "Freaky Friday" - where Jake sneaks Anna into the Teacher's Lounge to fix her test. Anna is worried about getting caught, but Jake says something to the point of "Don't worry, they're fried. They won't even notice you." Then you proceed to see all these teachers suffering from exhaustion, lack of brain stimulation, and much more. I definitely see some similarities of this scene and my co-workers. A summer break is much needed to refresh and renew strength and sanity.

Counting down the days...13 school days to be exact....

Until next time....

Pure Relaxation

Today was Becky’s birthday. Becky is my neighbor and the oldest expat female. Although she is still in her thirties – she is like the momma of our group. She takes care of us when we are sick or injured, bakes amazing treats for us every week, and engages in conversation with us at all hours of the day. She is amazing and we are so lucky to have her and her family in our lives.

The expat girls arranged a surprise getaway to Jakarta and spend the day in the spa. We picked her up early in the morning and made our way to the city. The trip was long due to construction. The thing about living in Indonesia is that there is only one way to get somewhere. There are no back roads, and when there’s construction or traffic, you are stuck in gridlock without any means of escape.

After an hour and a half we made it to the spa, which happened to be tucked away in a residential area. Each of us chose our own customized treatment and started our morning and afternoon of being pampered. I ended up getting a cream bath (which is a hair moisturizer with aloe, scalp massage, and back massage all wrapped up into one amazing package) and then got a pedicure.

I felt truly relaxed and stress free. The first time since I got back from holiday in Bali. You’d think that after a nice vacation, I would be refreshed. Yes, I was refreshed but the energy was sucked out of me almost immediately – and continues to wither away with each day that passes. There is so much to accomplish before the end of the school year that it’s harder to look past each day, let alone each hour. I am not complaining, but it is overwhelming and difficult to see the end.

Anyway – I came home feeling like I was floating on a cloud. All the knots in my back were gone, calluses on my feet were no longer visible, and my hair smelled of exotic flowers and aloe vera. This proved to be much motivation to me and I ended up getting more school work done in one hour than I have for days.

I am thankful for these days that he gives me to unwind. There needs to be a balance of sanity and – well – practically everything else in life. Sometimes I don’t take the time to find a healthy balance and end up driving myself off the deep end. These things seem to rejuvenate me and push me forward, I definitely need to do them more often.

Terrible, Awful, No-Good, Very Bad Day

Ever have one of those days that you just woke up on the WAY wrong side of the bed? Yes, Friday was one of those days for me. Everyone that crossed my path or made eye contact with me was on my list. I honestly had no reason for my piss poor attitude.

My mother has always told me to choose joy, and this was one of those days that I openly bashed down that option. I just didn’t want to. Yes, it was bad decision making on my part, but sometimes I just have to ride my bad attitude out. I definitely wasn’t the lone wolf in choosing to opt out of a joyous day. It seemed as if a looming rain cloud was suffocating the staff and teachers. Nearly everyone was ready to take on a boxing match with everyone. This definitely proves that misery thrives on company.

My impatience and lack of tolerance got the best of me in the afternoon. One of my students was obnoxious, scaling to a whole new realm of annoying. He was throwing kids’ shoes in the rafters, running around like a mad man, and terrorizing the music teacher. We tried talking to him, having him stay in for break time, and a number of other mechanisms. Nothing worked. Halfway through the class I had him sit under my desk. Still, he was laughing and screeching and thrashing his legs out from under the desk.

I looked at him and asked him to stop and he refused. Then I made a deal with the classroom management devil. I crossed over to the dark side and did something that was against all my teaching beliefs. I bribed him with candy (despite his bad behavior) with candy if he would be quiet. For an hour I passed him candy and was able to get peace – FINALLY. Budi laughed and admitted he’d do the same thing if he had candy. The kids was driving everyone bonkers.

As I write this and look back on Friday, I realize my poor judgment (even despite the laughter that consumes me as I think of all the funny misfortunate things that occurred in the classroom that day). I would be lying if I said that I wish I could take that day back. Yes, it was not the best day I’ve ever been through, but I learned that an attitude like that can be miserable and cause uncontrollable mayhem in the classroom. Every day is a learning experience – and this particular day I learned a lot.

Grade 3 Chapel

With the play being over, I thought my life would slow down a little bit. Not. A. Chance. With Monday being the day for all teachers to attend the funeral of our school’s founder, Grade 3 was given a day and a half to prepare for their grade-level chapel.

The students worked really hard, as did we. Budi and I blocked out a number of our classes to focus on this. Although Budi tries to help, I ultimately have to be in charge of the chapel because I am in charge of Biblical Studies in our classroom.

The day of the chapel came and my students were revved up about it. I had no doubt in my mind that they pull it off. Our theme was the armor of God, and the kids had some of the cutest skits that demonstrated the meaning of pieces of armor. Then it came to the sermon. Yes, it was yours truly that was in charge of delivering it.

Now, I have to admit I was a bit nervous because my Easter program sermon was not the best thing that I ever did. However, I had an interactive story that students had to opening participate and cheer in. They were enthusiastic and eating out of the palm of my hand. Then I reviewed each piece of armor and dressed the part in an outrageous manner. My helmet – my motorbike helmet; my breastplate – a piece of poster board; my shield – a collaboration of construction paper; my sword – a light saber; and my sandals – my dilapidated bath shoes.

I walked around and explained each – the students thought it was hilarious and were so enthralled. It was the most fun I’ve ever had. Out of all the chapels Grade 3 has been in charge of, this by far was one of my favorites. It ran smoothly and the kids were so attentive and well behaved. With each day that passes, I feel like I can a mind full of new knowledge and experience.

A Surprising Turn to Success

Yes, it's me and I'm still alive. I feel like I've become a stranger on this blog in recent weeks (and perhaps even months).

After coming back from a very relaxing holiday, I was faced with dread of the upcoming drama that hung over my head like a brewing storm cloud. I dreaded stepping foot onto campus on Tuesday because the future of the drama looked pretty dang bleak. The kids were not in sync with their lines, they were MIA on random occasions. All I wanted to do was quit.

Tuesday's practice drove me over the edge. It was a lucky thing that there wasn't a cliff nearby - I might have been so far delusional enough to plunge. In the words of my father (who refuses to even think of the idea of being in a home when he's older), "Hello, my name is Cliff. Cliff-Jumper." I came home in tears and a haze of negativity. I cried myself to sleep and came to school the next day with puffy eyes and a headache.

The final dress rehearsal lasted 5 hours and went fantastic. It was as if a light bulb flickered on in their brains and everything kicked into gear as it should have been. I left school feeling more positive about the final performance than I have for the past 3 months.

I got to school early and set up the sound system, prepped the costumes, and anxiously waited my little actors and actresses to arrive for preparation.

As I ran around backstage during the performance, I have to admit I felt a surge of energy and happiness flow through my veins. I never expected to feel like this, especially with the recent history of feelings of failure that consumed me. The performance went on without a hitch. The kids were spectacular! They did their best, and their best was even better than what I expected.

After the curtain closed and much applause, I was praised by parents, teachers, and students alike. They doted on it, saying it was the best performance they had ever seen by PYP. Rave reviews keep swinging my way and have caused me to re-think my thoughts on "never doing after school drama again."

I'm so happy that it turned out to be a success, but I would be lying if I told you that I wished after school drama was still happening. It is a great accomplishment, but I definitely am enjoying the break that it's provided to me. However, that does not mean that I am eagerly anticipating next year's performance. There will be a lot of changes, but I think it will all for the better.

Thanks for all your prayers and support. It's been a bumpy road to the final end game, but it was well worth it.

Bali Vacay

Stress was something that dominated the weeks leading up spring break. I was thrilled the moment school let out last Friday. I spent the evening packing and watching movies before heading out on my week long vacation in Bali. Yes, Bali again. However, this time to a different section - one less populated and touristy.

My neighbors: Jared, Becky, and their daughter Cara Grace were my travel buddies. We left just before noon and made it to the airport a little later than expected. We almost got kicked off our flight for being five whopping minutes late for check-in.

The flight was short, just an hour and a half. We got picked up by the hotel driver and traveled another two hours north to a small town called Amed. It was pitch black when we arrived - which is a lot different than towns like Legion and Kuta, where I spent my last holiday.

I went straight to bed, which was a good thing because the glaring sunrise happened at 4 am. It was so bright that it would wake even the dead. As much as I didn't want to get up that early, it was definitely beautiful. And apart from that, I was able to actually see the gorgeous hotel grounds.

The hotel was very quaint, only five bungalows, an infinity pool, access to a black sand beach, and a small restaurant perched over the ocean. All of the grounds are terraced and decorated with hindu statues. It was everything you'd think an island paradise should be.

I must say the week was very uneventful for the most part. Every day was routine - breakfast, swimming in the pool, nap, lunch, snorkeling or swimming, another nap, and dinner. There was no sense of time or urgency and it was everything I needed.

The only thing that put a little dent in my peaceful week was the motorbike accident I was in. I was riding with my friend Josh into town, to get some fresh fruit, and we hit a patch of sand and gravel the wrong way and went flying. I lost vision for 10 minutes (which was terrifying), scraped up my legs and arms, and had 4 huge gashes: one on my knee and the rest on my forearm/elbow. It was a blessing to have Josh there because the whole ordeal was terrifying.

However, as scary as the accident was, the locals were so helpful in getting a doctor and supplying me with water and a bed to lie down on. The doctor was just as painful as the accident. She gave me a shot of anesthesia for my leg and didn't wait for it to settle in before beginning to stitch me up. I felt every bit of pain I wasn't supposed to, screaming "sakit, sakit" - which means "pain, pain." So instead of waiting, she gave me another shot before continuing.

Anyway, after the stitches and clean up, the hotel manager (who graciously drove out to pick us up) brought us back. I spent the rest of the day in bed and watching Al Jazeera, the Arab news base.

I contemplated hitching an early flight home, but then I realized I would be sulking in my bed and decided that there was as good as anywhere to heal and rest up. It was a good decision. I was able to soak my wounds in the salt water ocean, swim, and see the most awe-striking sunrises I've ever seen in my life.

The rest of the week was relaxing, which consequently included a trip to Kuta for shopping (of course). The plane was delayed a bit, which was fine because I could grab some free internet and catch up on my emails. However, when we arrived in Jakarta we were in for a never road trip back home. Normally it would take an hour and a half to get home. We were stuck in the car for five freaking hours with a whiny six year old complaining about everything under the moon.

When I finally got home, I hopped in bed and crashed. With a few blips aside from the trip, I definitely think it was a thoroughly enjoyable vacation. I am looking forward to the next trip to Bali in June. Although it is about 2 months away, time seems to fly by here in Indonesia.

Until next time...much love and Happy Easter!

Knowing the Right Buttons to Push

After spending just over three quarters with my grade 3 students, I have learned to love them as my own children. I know each of their strengths and weaknesses, their sense of humor, and their character traits. It pains me to know that I only have a few short weeks left with them.

One of my student-teacher mentors always told me that a new teacher will never forget their first class. That is definitely true in this case. There is so much uniqueness and chaos that is woven through this particular class that I have come to admire spending time with them each day.

Today was one of those days that I know I'll look back on and laugh at in the future.

Like I said, I have come to learn my students, and in retrospect, my students have come to learn me. They specifically have learned exactly what buttons to push before I am one step from pulling my hair out and two steps away from bashing my head against the wall. As annoying as it can be at the time, it definitely brings a huge smile to my face as I think about it moments later.

Today in library I was grading tests while my kids were reading silently around the room. Silence, pure silence - it was almost too good to be true. And then an explosion of sound occurred; but not just any sound, the sound of one of my naughtiest boys belting out the song that I hate most in this world. What song is that? "Whip My Hair" by Willow Smith - if you've never heard it, you should definitely look it up. The song is so annoying and gets stuck in your head like a fatal airborne disease.

Anyway, one of the girls in my class told Braven that I hate that song, and apparently he wanted confirmation. Randomly he stood up and dropped his book, belting out the song and pelvic thrusting like he was the son of Elvis. I dropped all my tests and covered my ears, screeching and breaking the rule of silence that should be instilled in the library. With Braven instigating chaos, the majority of my kids joined in and closed in around me, dancing and singing. Without the consent of my body, I began riveting with pain. Yes, pain. This song distresses me so much that I lose an incredible amount of pain tolerance.

The librarian just looked at me and my dancing students, and laughed. He knows by now that silence is something that simply cannot be attained by my class. Although, secretly I think he likes it because our presence tends to be more entertaining than the cinema.

By the time I got back to my classroom I was crabby. Yes, a simple, endless song definitely got the best of me. I then declared that "Ms. Marie was on holiday and her twin was going to be the teacher for the next three days." Spur of the moment I made a new alias: Loretta Einstein Van Kuiken aka Ms. Einstein. I made all my kids call me that and apparently the name stuck for three hours beyond that. They asked me all different kinds of questions and were totally roped in. Apparently Ms. Einstein was stricter and more non-negotiable than Ms. Marie.

Then the best part came around. As it was time to go home, Andrew came up to pray. He folded his hands and began. Just before he said 'amen' - he added "And please help Ms. Einstein turn back into Ms. Marie - we miss her already." Suffice it to say, there was no 'amen', but rather an outburst of laughter from both the students and teachers. Oh, it was priceless!

After all the kids yelled their goodbyes to Pak Budi and Ms. Einstein, I headed down to the drama room, only hear my students telling their nannies about their new teacher. They definitely thought it was epic.

I've learned to harness my irritability (perhaps after a minor outburst) into something that shifts the focus into something enjoyable and even humorous. Its not the easiest thing to do, but it definitely provides some of the best stories for everyone to reflect on.

Time Withers Away

It's been quite a while since I last updated my blog. To be honest I could think of a million excuses of why I didn't update it, life has just been so busy that time seems to just wither away like dust in the wind.

Most of my days are spent at school (obviously) but my after school activities have been severely increased. After school drama has dominated my life from the hours of 3 - 7. By the time I get home all I want to do is absolutely nothing, and that would be lovely if that was the case.

Aside from this quarter, I have been on top of my lesson plans and grading. However, ever since the drama progressed, my motivation to be ahead of the game has dwindled down. So once evening strikes and I actually get home, I am grading and doing lesson plans - which is a totally new and foreign concept that is not my favorite thing to do. Ever since college I have been an overly-ambitious lesson planner, and having my lesson plans be put off till a few days before makes me absolutely crazy. I'd rather be ahead of the game, rather than come face to face with each day's lesson.

I'd like to say I cannot wait for the drama to be done so I can get back into my routine, but I have to admit that a change of pace is always good. I guess it's a contradictory lifestyle filled with both pros and cons.

I feel like the past few weeks have been nothing but a blur but adventure hides around every corner. I wish I could recount all the little things that made my life so enjoyable, despite the fact that they may be petty. So to sum everything up in my spare time I visited some friends (in the late hours of the evening, seeing my schedule is rather inflexible these days), got a new kitten called Sassy (who is the cutest and whiniest kitten I've ever came across), and watched a record amount of movies (to keep me trucking along in my grading and lesson planning). Yes, it doesn't sound so exciting, but it was truly relaxing.

As the days roll on, I realize how quickly life passes before your eyes. You blink and nearly a month passed by, blink again and maybe a year. In recent weeks, I've really learned to appreciate all that God has given me and not to take it for granted. It is this life that we have such a short time (although some days may seem eternal compared to others) and never truly know when we will pass on into eternity. Everyday is full of blessing, you just need to keep your eyes open to see them.

Days Withering Away

As Easter approaches, so my drama nears. It's always a little intimidating whenever a performance comes closer. The jitters and nerves start to settle in, and I begin to wonder if it will all turn out right. It always does, but the last few weeks always seem to get the best of me.

Today we did our audio recording for the performance. I tell you what, to record 34 kids in a studio is more work than it actually sounds. If perfection actually existed, it would have been so beneficial to have it present today. However, each kid was dedicated to their recording and we got done a little farther behind schedule, but at least we got it done.

The kids were wiped by the time we ended but so excited that we made a great stride of progress. We only have 2 weeks of practice, and I hope everything falls into place before too long. I'll keep you posted!

Till next time!

A Prequel to a Nearing Holiday

The first week back to school proved to be a challenge and yet rewarding, however once the weekend hit, I was ready for a relaxing but fun-filled weekend. For the past few months I had been organizing a girls weekend in Jakarta and this particular weekend happened to fall on a weekend when I needed it most.

Saturday morning I met up with some friends downtown Jakarta. We roamed through Kemang, which is a modern artsy sector of Jakarta. We got some coffee and went to several neat places including a pottery shop, bamboo nativity house, and a handicraft store. I managed to get some Christmas shopping done and even grabbed some fun things for my house.

Around dinner time we headed to our hotel, which happened to be one of the nicest 4-star hotels in the area. The four of us were assigned to a two bedroom suite with a balcony overlooking the skyline and a rooftop pool to lounge in after the city closes down for the evening.

After an amazing dinner, the four of us swam in the pool and enjoyed a cool breeze. We called it an early night and laid in bed watching the new rendition of Hawaii 5-0 (occasionally switching back to a happy show so we wouldn't be scared).

I fell asleep peacefully and thoroughly enjoyed my sleep until I was awoken by the mosque calling. I have to say, I am truly lucky to be living in Sentul where I live far enough away from the mosque that I do not need to hear it.

The morning allowed us to happily indulge in one of the finest buffet breakfast I've ever had. The best part was that it was predominantly Westernized so the norm of having rice was out of the question.

We went to church and from there the weekend dwindled down faster than the blink of an eye. I got home feeling so relaxed and yet also incredibly tired. Just as I was about to relax, I got a surprise visit by a snake that was creeping in the corner of my basement. I did some fierce sign language charades to rely this information to my Indonesian neighbor and eventually got through to him that I needed assistance. He graciously killed my snake and removed it from the remote vicinity of my house.

Aside from a few very minor blips in the weekend, I have to admit it was just what I needed after being laid up for a week and then struggling for a week to get back on my feet.

Laughter Through the Struggles

This week has been excruciating for me and it's only Tuesday! The first week back to the job is always hard to adjust. However, I have found it even more difficult to do so when it includes crutches, a tightly wrapped leg, and pain meds.

SPH is a tiered 7-level campus with the absence of an elevator. Being on floor three has never been a problem until now. By the time I make it up one flight of steps, I'm ready for a nap. Then, when I'm lucky enough to get to my classroom, my leg is throbbing and I'm ready to throw in the towel and collapse for a long night's sleep under my desk. So far, you've gained a glimpse of how the first half hour of my day unfolds.

If you're assuming that a long, treacherous journey to my classroom takes most of my minimal energy away from me, you'd be assuming right. Thankfully I have a bit of time to recover and mentally prepare myself for the kids. In this time of preparation, it sometimes is hard to see how the positives outweigh the negatives of being at school. Yet, everything seems to come into a focused perspective when the kids enter the classroom and shower me with enthusiastic 'good mornings'. From there on out, jokes and laughter seem to assist me to surf through the day.

The jokes and laughter come easily due to the fact that I am on a handful of prescribed from my accident. I've been keeping a strict schedule on when to take it, but the schedule means diddley squat to the side-effects. Most times I am teaching when the side-effects come in swinging like a blunt force trauma. I wish I had a recorder for all to hear the crazy things that have slipped out of my mouth these past few days. The kids (in both grade 3 and grade 6) were baffled at first, but are eager to hear what their crazy teacher might say next.

So far, this story has been one of epic proportions in my classroom:

As I was doing a uniform check (since administration has been urging us to do so more often), one of my kids walked up the stairs with his shirt untucked. Shazam! Size-effects ensued, I yell, "Hey, you know better! Tuck in your sh*t!" Whoopsie, my bad.

And instead of going to tattle to someone that Ms. Marie said a bad word, he yells back with a toothy grin, "Okay, Ms. Marie. I'll tuck in my sh*t! Did you hear that everyone? Ms. Marie wants me to tuck in my sh*t!"

Now you tell me, readers, how could you possibly punish a kid for saying that when their teacher made the initial slip-up (due to a drug-induced haze...and yes, I do like being a little melodramatic, thanks for wondering). Of course this sparked giggles amongst passing middle school students, and all I wanted to do was slap myself upside the head.

That was the first of many laughs this first week has provided. Then we get to grade 6. Recently we have been studying World War 2 (the setting behind the scenes in the The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe). Today we were talking how to create war obituaries (as we are creating a large scale WW2 newspaper). I told my kids that they needed to practice writing obituaries, so they had to create one for themselves. The guidelines were simple, it had to be truthful to a "T", except for the cause of death.

Immediately one of the girls shouted, "Yes! I've always wanted to commit suicide and live!"

I mean, come on! Who says something like that? And instead of trying to level with the girl, what happens? I burst out into laughter (I may or may not have provided a shower of saliva to the front row of students) and fall into a desk. Suffice it to say the rest of the lesson was a failure from there on out.

Yes, I have had pain these past few days, and I've hit an emotional rock bottom. Yet I come to school and I find solace and joy in my kids. Despite the fact that I may be a walking zombie with a temporarily unpredictable mouth, I can't imagine another day away from them. They always bring a wave of refreshment to me. I am so blessed to have them in my life, even on days when they make me want to pull out my hair.

Thankful

This past week I've been laid up on the couch from my motorbike accident. I've spent countless hours watching movies and catching up on emails. You'd think that after being off four days for sun-poisoning, I'd find something a little bit more productive while sprawled on the couch.

Bravery has never been my stronghold - never has, probably never will be. So while I was on the couch, I got a bad case of the "what-ifs." When my mind wanders, it wanders to the world's worst scenarios EVER. After several melt-downs, I finally got control of my emotions and thoughts and swept my worries under the rug.

Tonight (Friday), just a little more than a week after my accident, I went for a follow-up checkup with Dr. Daniel. Good news is - my knee is healing properly and I won't have to have surgery. The circulation is normal and swelling is going down. However, there is something needs to be monitored closely for the next week. My lower ribcage area has broken tissue and some mild abnormal hemorrhaging. It causes some fierce pain when I am laying down, hiccuping, laughing, and breathing deep. Until next week I'll be on steroids and new pain meds. Hopefully after next week, I will be completely medically cleared by the doctor.

Until then, I can return to school as long as I used at least one crutch and sit down for the majority of the day. It will be nice to see everyone at school again. On Thursday, Budi and a few specialist teachers brought my class over to come visit. It was so refreshing to talk with them and just listen to how their week has been. I have truly loved getting to know each and every one of them these past months. Each one of them brings a special blessing to my life.

Thanks for all your prayers and support! Until next time...

Unforgettable Thursday

This past Thursday was a day of ultimate highs and devastating lows. The day started off with a rush to figure out chapel. Prekindy and Grades 1 -3 teachers were in charge of chapel. We came up with some fantastic skits that I was involved in. It was so nice to be involved in drama for a short time. I like directing and being in charge of drama, but there's just something about being the star.

When it came time to perform, I even had that nervous knot in my stomach like I did in high school. The kids were all eager to see their Dancing Drama/English teacher on stage. It was a blast! The kids were laughing, the teachers were laughing and trying to be serious. It was great to get some stage time again, but I'm back to finding contentment in the the classroom.

After school, I had my Bahasa Indonesia lesson with my friend, Fanny. I learned some new verbs and a handful of nouns. I can now make simple complete sentences in Bahasa. I am so proud of myself. I need to keep practicing, but I feel like I am making lots of progress. She is such a great teacher, and I enjoy learning this language with her. The phonetics are similar to Spanish - which sometimes gets me confused because I start to incorporate random Spanish words into my vocabulary without thinking. However, Bahasa Indonesia is so much easier to learn than any language I've studied. There are no verb tenses and very little grammar rules. Gotta say I love that.

After school, I dropped off my things at home and headed to the grocery store. I got groceries and a new notebook for my Bahasa before jumping on my bike and heading home. It was then that the fateful accident occurred. I'm sure most of you readers have heard about it by now (one way or another).

I was coming up to the round-about by the mosque to check the traffic situation (going about 45 km/hr) and a car stopped ahead of me. I slammed into the car, hitting my head on the windshield and my chest on my handlebars before flying about 3 meters off my bike and onto the pavement. The front of my bike was crushed like an accordion (but still standing upwards surprisingly) while I lay like a crippled turtle on the road.

The first thought that came to my mind is - "I'm not dead! Thank, God I wore a helmet." After that, everything flashed by in fast forward. About 30 Indonesian men flocked around me, including police officers and men coming out from the mosque. I felt like an act from a freak circus. The man that I hit came out of his car, he was from England and could not speak a lick of Bahasa - so I guess that was to my benefit. He helped me up and drove me home. He was so courteous and compassionate, making sure that I could move okay and breathe okay. I offered to pay for his little dent in his truck, but he said I had enough damage to my bike and my body to worry about.

He brought me to my house and some other guy drove my bike home. Thank goodness it was still drivable. I went over to my neighbors and she arranged for me to go to the local doctor at the apotik.

After a short wait in the apotik, Dr. Daniel saw me. He took a quick look at my knee and said that I had torn muscle tissue and soft tissue in my knee, causing the protective fluid to leak and become bloody. He asked me to take of my pants so he could have a closer look. I said "Heck no, I am not wearing any underwear so I am not taking off my pants." He didn't think that was funny or that I was serious - however, I was dead serious. He ended up just pushing my pantleg up and taking blood samples from my knee. He put me on crutches and in a brace for a week before doing x-rays and contemplating surgery. After looking at my knee, he took a look at my ribcage and told me I had a fractured rib - which would make using crutches (for my knee) a bit more strenuous.

I got home to see a few people before calling my mom and dad and Grandma and Grandpa Mulder. They were all surprisingly calm, as was I (which was a real shocker). From there I moped around before going to bed and getting the world's worst night sleep.

It was one of those days that all the best things and all the worst things happen all at once. But as I think about what happened with that accident. I can't help but think how blessed I am. It could have been a whole lot worse, but God had bigger and better plans for me. I don't know what they are right now, but I'm sure they will unfold with time. Until then, I'll rest up and hopefully heal (without surgery would be nice). Thanks for all the thoughts and prayers!

A Stress-Free Atmosphere

By some random freak chance, I have seemed to adopt a calm and carefree attitude in my classroom. I really enjoy it, because for once I don't feel like pulling my hair out even once throughout the day. However, all is not calm in the old grade three school room (is it ever?).

Today is the deadline for digital portfolios, and there are still a handful of students that are closer to the starting line than the finished line. With this looming over their heads, they seemed to have popped some crazy pill that have made them like wild broncos. Poor Budi is so stressed out, which is unusual because usually our roles are switched.

There is one thing that is that is mind boggling to me. The kids took up playing with random lengths of yarn (mostly throwing it, chasing it, and pouncing on it - sound like any four legged feline that you know of?). I am quite sure that I have finally confiscated every last piece of it, and right now it fills up an entire drawer in my classroom. At least they are easily entertained. However, even after 3 quarters, they fail to see the difference between playing during class time and a break time.

It truly is a roller coaster in this classroom - but then again, I wouldn't want it any other way.

The Littlest Things

Have you ever had one of those days where it is the littlest thing just makes your day? Just add a few more of those little things and that summed up my day. After having a few rocky weeks and a number of days where only expletives could define my emotions, this was a nice change of pace.

To start the day, the kids came in all bubbly and happy, and of course chaotic as usual. Recently in devotions, my kids have been so enthralled with the bible stories we are reading. Today's conversations involved endless questions about the Dead Sea, Jesus' triumphal entry, and the some side-tracked comment about mating puppies (which definitely got a few laughs). The kids were late to their PE event because of all the questions.

After the kids left, Budi and I had a sing-off of eighties songs. We love to blast music in our classroom when the kids are at specials. It's so therapeutic. We worked on lesson planning and even came finished our field trip proposal for next week. These hour long breaks always seem to get me in a great mood for teaching.

Once the kids came back, we caught up on some Charlotte's Web (which we are reading as a novel study in Grade 3). It brings back such fun childhood memories when I read this book. I absolutely love watching them get excited about what they are reading; it makes me feel like I'm experiencing the book for the first time all over again.

Chapel was a big event, as usual. My kids have finally learned to harness their mouths for one single hour out of the week (in hopes of winning the beloved spotter award - however, I do suppose it also has something to do with my bribes of candy for good behavior). Instead of the chapel room we made our way three flights up to the music room. The teachers all got to sit on couches (which was a lot more comfortable than the hard wood floor).

The songs were so upbeat and fun to sing, and you can only guess which class was the only group not to participate enthusiastically. Yes, that's right - mine. They stood there and sang monotonously. It was such a pitiful sight that I couldn't help but laugh.

At the end of chapel, the principal announced the winning class of the spotter award, and my kids one. However, she didn't even know what grade level my kids were in. She just said "this group of kids right here" - talk about major brain cramp!

A celebratory march led us out of the music room and downstairs, where we had a few moments to kill before lunch. Budi and I decided to practice our Easter song for my PYP production. The song that is assigned to Grade 3 is one of my favorites called "My Savior, My God." Volume has always been an issue for my kids. I can't decide if it is because of lack of effort or nervousness. Today - I finally found out why. I turned down the volume to hear them sing and they were bad. Bad doesn't even do them justice - they were more horrendous than a band of dying farm animals. There is one child, whom I love so dearly, that sang so off pitch that I had to hide my face behind my computer because I was laughing to the point of tears. I'm sure that Jesus loves hearing his voice, but aside from Him, I'm positive there is no one else that feels that way.

Lunch came and went (and whoops, forgot about my recess duty). Once the kids were back inside, it was candy time. I've developed a helpful silence strategy for my kids - which also doubles as my bribery for chapel. The kids relish in the fact that I give them candy every day. One piece and they are temporary residents on Cloud 9.

Budi took his turn to teach Math, and I randomly started to search for a more inventive way to present my upcoming Bible lesson on the different pieces of the Armor of God. That's just what I did. I found a project that allows students to create a whole suit of armor out of poster board. We initiated the project with the helmet of salvation. The kids were so ecstatic (especially the boys - they are always so hard to please with projects). It is an epic event already, and it only happened a few hours ago. Throughout the next two weeks we will finish our study on the Armor of God and hopefully have a fantastic finished project, that will be ready just in time for our next Grade 3 chapel.

The rest of the afternoon flew by until the end of the day at prayer time. The kids were trying to distract me from praying so they could steal an extra piece of candy. No such luck, I have the reflexes of a puma and the eyesight of a bat in total darkness. When I finally shooed the vultures away from my desk and started to pray, one of the kids snorted and a symphony of giggles burst out of all fifteen of them. The hyena giggles were extremely contagious and before I knew it I was struggling to finish the prayer. When the "amen" finally game, I nearly fell down in laughter.

I chased all of my kids out of the classroom to escape the horrific giggle episode re-make of the Teletubbies. For some reason they just want to stay after school and hang out with their crazy and unconventional teachers. I must admit that's better than them racing out the door with a pure hatred for Grade 3.

Yes, it was just a bunch of little funny things, but they always seem to paste a smile on my face. You know, people say that you will never forget your "first class", and I know that's true. I've had so much fun and it will be so hard to give them up and let them go to Grade 4 next year. Just thinking about it makes me want to cry. Yes, they drive me bonkers at times, but they are my pride and joy. They make me more proud than I've ever been in my life. Their growth from the beginning of the year to now has been remarkable; not only academically, but socially and spiritually. If I can successfully achieve this every year here-on-after, I know that I will be able to make my mark on these kids' hearts and impact our future generation of leaders.

Shopping Extravaganza

With the week winding down in an all too familiar chaotic fashion, I was quite excited to start off the weekend with a bang. To sum up my day, I guess it was just that. Seven of us expats loaded up in a car and headed off to Jakarta for some home shopping.

With only 3 months away until my big move from this GINORMOUS house to a more reasonable apartment, I have been slowly prepping myself by developing color schemes for each room and flexible decorating ideas. Today I made a big dent in the decoration department and focused predominantly on furniture shopping.

We did a few errands on the way until reaching Pasa Raya, our first leg of the journey. With my enthusiastic spending habits there, I had to put a leash on myself and show some constraint. That is definitely harder to do than it might sound. There are so many unique and beautiful things there, that any buy could be justifiable. I do not see myself as a materialist person, but when I see beauty in art and crafts, it's as if a siren is calling out to a ship in hopes of a most excellent disaster.

I perused every square inch, determined to only buy something if absolutely necessary. For nearly an hour, I walked around with my brain ticking and my teeth grinding, trying to find an excuse. I came up with nothing until a moment before leaving. I am collecting fake flowers for some of my pottery back home and I found some handmade ones that were absolutely gorgeous. Cha-ching! 18,000 ($1.80) rupiah later, I found myself impressed with ample self control.

This long trip around Pasa Raya was due for a reward - an amazing lunch at Dallas Steakhouse. It was definitely probably one of the best meals I've had here since my arrival: smoked hickory bbq ribs! Pork is anything but a commodity here, and so I took full advantage of the fact that it was served at this restaurant. My stomach thanked me graciously after I devoured the delicious meal.

With a short side trip before our biggest leg of the shopping trip, I took a post-dinner nap in the back seat of the car. Not but an hour later, we ventured into Central Jakarta to the Rattan strip. For those of you wondering what rattan is, I will clear that up for you right now. Rattan is a mix between wicker and scrapped wood that has been created into fine woven designs (mainly furniture).

I walked up and down the Rattan Strip, bargaining hard bargains and getting away with some steals! I found two matching end tables, sofabed lounge chair, bathroom shelving unit, and a storage trunk. Each expat bought numerous furniture pieces before renting a small truck to deliver it to our homes.

There were about 7 men loading this tiny truck up. Although I was convinced that only half of our finds were going to fit in the bed, they strategically placed it (towering it well over the top of the truck) so to make sure that only one truck had to be brought back to Sentul. I wish I had brought my camera to show how crazy it looked. Definitely looked like an episode of the Beverly Hillbillies - Jakarta Style.

Surprisingly we hit minimal traffic and were home in an hour, record timing for rush hour. It took about that same amount of time to divvy up the furniture and get it to each house. Most of my furniture has not moved from it's clustered location in the upstairs landing since coming home hours ago. Tomorrow will be another day - procrastination at it's finest.

I look forward to my big move and setting up my house exactly how I want it. Right now, there's just a bunch of jumbled stuff in obscure nooks, collecting dust until moving day. I would gladly situate it if I wasn't such a perfectionist. It would take nearly a month to get every little thing the precise way I want it, and by then, it will be just short of two months before moving it again and getting re-situated. Why bother?

Can't wait till June. Hopefully I'll be able to take some amazing photos of the new homestead so you can enjoy! Until then, much love sent your way!

A Week of Sicknesses

It's been one of those weeks that some nasty bug is going around. Every day I have at least 2 kids absent, and there was even a day where I was missing 4 kids. It seems like a totally different make up with certain kids being gone. Budi even got sick on Wednesday! One by one they are getting plucked off my role call, some with stomach flu, others with migranes, and even one with typhoid! I know that I'm coming down with a stomach bug, but I'm hoping it will pass with the ample amount of water I'm drinking.

The more kids leave the classroom, the harder it is to do a complete and thorough lesson. I try my best, but I end up teaching that same lesson two or three more times just to catch up with everyone who is sick. I understand that it is part of being a classroom teacher, but it is definitely frustrating at times, such as today.

In Grade 3 we are in the first few chapters of "Charlotte's Web" for our novel study this unit. It is so fun seeing them get so intrigued. As I watch them, I feel like I am reliving my own childhood. It seems like just yesterday that I was reading this with my teacher. It's such a classic book. And as much as I enjoy reading it with them, I can't help but be pestered by the fact that in a few days time I am going to have to go over it all over again (more than once).

Oh well, sickness is nothing but a rotten cycle. Sooner or later it will catch me, whether I want it to or not. Until then, I will work diligently ahead so to cover me in case I am sick. Budi is doing the same, and since we are doing it together, we have a better chance of smooth transitions if sickness consumes one of us. It is such a blessing to have such a great partner like him!

Marie and the Spelling Bee

This title is the perfect for someone looking for a book title. Kudos to myself :)

Anyway, today was the day of the spelling bee semi-finals for each grade level. The kids have been anticipating this for weeks and suffice it to say, their nerves got the best of them.

For Grade 3, I was a judge that wrote down words to ensure that they spelled them correctly. The first few rounds they flew through, but then the harder words hit like a punch in the face. My kids started to make silly mistakes or forget to ask for a definition (especially for homonyms). They pressed through as best as they could until something surprising happened. Two of my mid-level spellers surpassed even my best ones.

There were a few times my jaw dropped because of some of the words they spelled. After and hour of grueling competition between these two spellers, Jonathan took the lead and respelled a misspelled word that his competitor got wrong. One word left, and if he spelled it right, he would be the winner. He did it! I was so proud of him!

We were given an hour break before Grade 6 was scheduled for their semi-final round. For this round, I was the reader who gave the words, vocalized definitions, and gave context clues in sentences. I have a group of excellent spellers and they pushed themselves into the high rounds before they started falling off the wagon.

The first girl out was stumped on a trick word (challet) - even though it probably didn't belong in that category. She was furious but was a good sport and kept from displaying a negative attitude.

I made a few mistakes as the reader. There was some chatting in the audience and I lost my focus. Instead of conferring with one of the judges, I said they were correct when they were wrong. The spellers didn't appreciate being pulled off the stage moments later because of my mistake. Thank goodness they are forgiving.

The spelling bee semi-finals proved to be successful in more ways than one. With the finals just around the corner, I will be practicing my listening skills and the kids their spelling skills. Good luck to all!

Until next time.